Plumbed

Last night I poured some caustic drain cleaner into our bathtub and bathroom sink. Both were draining slowly and, since I am now on maternity leave, I need to get this place in order before baby's imminent arrival.  That means cleaning the bathroom super well (Brad and I both have the ability to ignore a gross bathtub for longer than I care to admit). 

This morning when I woke up, I noticed that Brad's shower water was in the tub and it wasn't draining -- at all.  I came downstairs and called a plumber.  After spelling my last name SIX TIMES for the woman who answered the phone, I procured an appointment for Wednesday morning. I figured I would just, I don't know, shower quickly up to my ankles in cold dirty water? 

After that I started thinking about how I really didn't want to shower in the filth, so I decided to try our plunger in the bathtub. I figured the worst that could happen would be that it didn't work, crap would start coming back out of the drain into the tub, and I would call my friend Misty to see if I could shower at her place today. I had the plumber scheduled, so no big deal. I'm sure they've seen worse.  Lo and behold, it worked like a charm.  I took a shower and our drain drained like a normal drain.  I was immensely proud of myself.

So I came back downstairs and cancelled the plumber. Then I called Brad at work:

B: Hello??
K: I am a plumbing genius! *Goes on to describe in great detail how I awesomely saved the day and like $200.00 in plumber fees.*
B: Could you maybe text me or something that you are not in labor before you call?  Like, say, "I'm not having the baby, but I'm going to call you."

I guess I gave him a bit of a scare, especially since the last thing he said to me this morning on his way out the door was "call me if you go into labor!"





 

Pregnancy Update: 33 (!) Weeks

Well, I managed to survive 12 days of being alone and super pregnant in the southern summer heat while Brad was off having an awesome time in Colorado.  He sent me updates in the form of pictures of beautiful mountains and super awesome goats, and weather reports (70 degrees and sunny!) while I sweated in Southern West Virginia.  He had a great time though, and I am glad he was able to go.  

I can't believe I am 33 weeks pregnant! That means I only have 7-ish weeks left. Yikes!

Loving:

-Super cold water. Like, from the refrigerator and with lots of ice cubes. The more the better.  I'm thirsty all of the time.
-Feeling the baby. Not only feeling it move, but feeling its body. It keeps sticking its butt out at me in various positions. Sometimes if I poke it it will move or poke back.  It's kind of like playing with it, and it's kind of like something out of Alien. Either way, it's really really cool.
-GROUND BEEF. Sometimes it's all I can do to stop myself from driving to a fast food restaurant and buying something disgusting like a Whopper (I KNOW!  I haven't actually done this, but I've thought about it).  (Un)Fortunately, Brad prefers to eat things like spinach salads with chicken for dinner, which is what I should be craving. But I'm not.
-Friday Night Lights. Especially Tammy Taylor and Riggins.
-The baby's room. It's getting closer to being done and I looooove it!  Just need a few more things and a few finishing touches. I also need to make the mobile I've been putting off for weeks. Hopefully we can finish it up this weekend.
-My awesome friends, who are throwing us a sort of couples/families baby shower in a few weeks.  I can't wait!

Not Loving:

-Still the damned heat. When is fall coming? Hopefully any day now.
-Still the teenage boy breakouts.  WHY?
-Swollen hands and feet -- really swollen hands. I can't fit my wedding band past my knuckle, so I am out there looking like a single lady again.
-Ligament pain, which has been happening with alarming frequency the last few days.  It makes me double over and it really blows.   Hoping that ends soon, although it probably won't.
-Spotting all my favorite pumpkin beers in the supermarket and wishing Brad liked them so I could steal a sip. He continues to buy beers I don't like. 



In other news, Brad bought a new car, so we now officially both own vehicles that can drive safely on the highway. I don't think we have ever been in this situation -- at least one of us has always had a total piece of shit.  Now we both have grown up cars. Weeee!

Clay Matthews Bars

About a year and a half ago, when the Packers beat the Steelers in the Super Bowl, my parents (who understand my love for Green Bay Packers' outside linebacker Clay Matthews) sent me a box of Wheaties with Clay's photo on it, like so:

This has been unopened in my kitchen cupboard ever since.  Brad has been trying to throw the box away since it arrived, knowing that I would probably not eat them.  Since they expire next month, and I can't let Clay's legacy go to waste, I made a batch of Clay Matthews bars today.  Behold my crappy iphone photo:

And if you'd like to also make Clay proud, this is how we do it:

Clay Matthews Bars

Ingredients:

6 cups of Wheaties FUEL cereal with Clay Matthews' photo on it

11 ounces of marshmallows

~1/4 c of extra virgin coconut oil (see what I did there?  This is not the standard krispie-rice cereal bar recipe, no!)

Melt 3 TBSP of coconut oil in large pan over medium heat.  Take another little glop of it in your hands and coat a 9"x13"pan.

Add marshmallows and let them melt. Actually let them get a tiny bit carmelized/brown -- you will see faint swirls of caramel-colored marshmallow in the mix. This is a delicious thing. Just don't let them burn to the bottom of the pan. Stir, stir, stir.

Mix in cereal.

Pat mixture into pan. Let harden to room temperature. Eat a little corner piece, then cut the rest into squares.

                                                                            ---

This weekend, Brad and I and our friend Dave are headed up to beautiful Snowshoe West Virginia, here Brad will be participating in some ridiculously long mountain bike race, and I will be eating Clay Matthews Bars -- hey, the baby needs FUEL.

Someday I'll tell you about the time that I was 6 months pregnant and it as 100 degrees every day and we didn't have power for a week.  

Thanksgiving

Ah, the annual day of thanks and gluttony. As per usual, Brad and I made a big Thanksgiving feast this year. I am thankful that we are financially able to indulge like we did. Here are some other things I am thankful for this year:


Brad. Today, tomorrow, for the past 13 years, and forever.

My group of Charleston friends, who I have only met in the last year, and who make living here so much better.

Our new house, the nice flat neighborhood it is in, and again, that we have the means to live here comfortably.

Our upcoming trip back to Wisconsin to see family and friends. There is a new six month old addition to our group of hometown friends this year, and we can't wait to meet her.

My health, Brad's health, Ilsa's health, and the health of those we love.


I'm off this afternoon to lovely Fayetteville WV to hike and support local businesses. Happy 65 degree day in November.

The Importance of Flag Day

Five years ago today, Brad asked me to marry him. It was a random week night and we took a walk after work to a park on Lake Michigan. It was lovely and romantic and saying "yes" was the best (and easiest) decision I've ever made.

It happened to be Flag day, so I always remember the exact date.

In honor of my husband and our nearly 13 years of couplehood, here are just a few of the many ways in which he has made my life so, so much better:


-He inspired me to lose weight and become active. Not because he ever had a problem with my body, but because I felt like he deserved to be with someone who was healthy and who took care of herself. In the years since my initial weight loss, he has inspired me to canoe in the wilderness, hike mountains, cross country ski, and run. Watching him train and compete in bike races, from crits at the Pittsburgh oval to 100 milers to 24-hour mountain bike races, has inspired me to train for and meet my own athletic goals.

-He got me out of my hometown. I never would have left the little town I grew up in, let alone lived in Milwaukee, Pittsburgh, and West Virginia, had I not met Brad.

-He has made me more independent. Brad has a low tolerance for people's bullshit, including mine. He calls me out when I'm being ridiculous, and has helped me to see that I can do anything I want to, and there's absolutely no reason that I need someone to do it with me. My mother can't even put gas in her own car, so I value this more than I can even explain.

-We share a brain. Whether it's from being together for almost 13 years or because we truly are a perfect match, I don't know. But we have the exact same sense of humor and sometimes freak each other out by thinking the same thing at the same time. It's awesome.

-He has introduced me to things such as Tom Waits, camping, and Predator. And for that I will forever be grateful.

Brad is 100% my best friend and I am still sometimes amazed that I landed such a smart, funny, handsome and all around awesome guy. Here's to a lifetime of Flag days to celebrate. XO

On My Legs

I've always had big thighs. For the record, I am not calling myself fat. But my legs have always been fat. Large. Shapely. Thick. Or, to use the quintessential midwestern term, "sturdy." Because of this, I have never really worn shorts. Bermudas, sure. Knee-length running tights, yes. But never shorts.

Last week I purchased a pair of Nike Tempo running shorts. Partly because they are popular among runners and I want to be like everyone else, but also because Charleston? It gets super hot in the summer. Last year, I would put on my workout capri pants and run a couple of miles a couple of times a week. But now, my running schedule is busier and I run longer and the capris aren't going to cut it once the temperatures hit 90. And this will happen very soon.

I took them for a spin yesterday, drove to my favorite nearby trail for a quick and dirty 3-miler over my lunch break (Can I just say that this is the best part about working from home?). I'd already applied my Body Glide to avoid chub rub issues, so I took off in my shorts and I started up the hill.

A woman was walking on the trail, and I passed her around the 1.5 mile point and nodded pleasantries. She was looking at my legs as I passed.

"Oh shit, she must think my legs are too fat for these shorts. WTF lady? I can wear shorts if I damn well want to." These thoughts are rolling through my head as I plug along.

I reached the end of the trail and turned to head back. Wouldn't you know, I passed her again! "Hello," "Hi there," still obviously staring at my legs as I went by.

"I clearly should not be wearing these shorts. They must look really bad. I am a giant fat monster." It's amazing how quickly what I imagine one complete stranger thinks of me can ruin my mood.

When I got back to my car, I remembered that my leg looked something like this:

IMAGE SOURCE - if this was my actual leg I would not have these issues

And that might have been what she was staring at. Whew! Self-esteem meltdown caused by total stranger averted.

Here's a little bonus story:

Picture it: Pittsburgh, 2008. Brad's friend Ned rolls up to our house on his road bike to go for a ride with Brad.

From inside our kitchen, I hear Brad say, "Dude. Your thighs are huge."

And Ned answer,"Yeah, thanks!"

There's one conversation that would never pass between two women.

32 Going on 13(.1)

After weeks of quietly training, I finally signed up for the Decker's Creek Trail Half Marathon. The race is on June 4th, and I am simultaneously excited and terrified. 13.1 miles is a long distance to run, but I feel confident that I can do it. I just hope I don't win the caboose award for bringing up the rear.

Of course, I will be completing, not competing. I do have a goal time in mind, but that is plan B. Plan A is just to finish. I read a lot of runners' blogs, and I can't help but compare my slow running times to their much speedier ones. Not to mention all of the seriously fast runners who will be running the half marathon that day, who will probably be showered and on their way home by the time I finish. It's going to be very hard, but I'm going to try to only focus on myself, how I feel, and the goal at hand -- just to do it.

Brad, who has been sidelined for the last few weeks with a knee injury and is missing the beginning of his race season as we speak, helped me set up a training plan for the 8 weeks leading up to the race. This week was week 1 of his plan, and so far I've been doing well.

Week 1 Training:
Monday - Yoga
Tuesday - 3 miles intervals
Wednesday - 3 miles steady (I actually ran intervals this day instead)
Thursday - 3 miles intervals (I actually ran steady / tempo on this day)
Friday - Blissful rest!
Saturday - 9 miles
Sunday - 3 miles easy / recovery

You will see that this plan has me running 5 days a week, and before I had been running 3 or 4 and taking at least two complete rest days per week. It's going to be hard, but everything in life worth doing is hard.

In a Funk

It's been a rough couple of weeks. Here's why:

1. My car has been in the shop for nearly 3 weeks and needs a new transmission, to the tune of several thousand dollars.
2. I dropped my phone last week and the screen now has a giant crack across it. My only option is to tape it up and keep using it. Can you say "ghetto?"
3. Brad had the flu since Sunday and is just now feeling back to his normal self. I have not gotten it yet, but I feel off. Head floaty and kind of like I got hit by a truck or fell down the stairs
4. Oh, wait. I FELL DOWN THE STAIRS TODAY.

I haven't put on make up or done anything with my hair all week. I don't normally doll up too much to work from home, but I at least usually wear normal clothes and do a little something with myself. I am a newlywed after all! This week? I went out in public wearing sweatpants and Ugg boots, having not showered. Granted, it was only to Rite Aid to get Brad's Tamiflu prescription filled, but still.

But today, after wallowing in my "I'm getting sick" and then my "I fell down the stairs" all day, I finally got up from my desk at 500, took a shower, dried my hair and put on jeans and some mascara. I feel 100% better (although my ass still hurts something fierce from my tumble).

I'm in a funk, you could say. But I'm trying to pull myself out of it.

I could really use a cupcake right about now.

Lessons I Learned on My Trail Run This Morning

1. Even if it is only 50 degrees, don't wear a long-sleeved cotton shirt on a run. You may think that you will be fine, but after one uphill mile it will be all sweaty and you'll be hot. Then, later, you'll be freezing in the damp cotton.

2. Drinking water is good. Drinking water the day before a long, difficult run is even better. If you fail to do this you will have a splitting headache and you'll want to die. Also, you should buy a damn hand-held water bottle and use it already.

3. Just when you are about to die of dehydration, a knight in shining armor on a white horse (or, a husband in shiny spandex on a single speed mountain bike) will show up and offer you a drink from his bottle and words of encouragement. Fairy tales do come true!

4. Do not eat chips and hummus and halloween candy for dinner. There is no nutritional value in that and your body needs decent food to work properly. Your body hates you right now.

5. While trail running in late fall, sometimes you have to shuffle sideways down a rocky descent, holding onto a tree for dear life. It's the only way to avoid a rolled ankle. Also, you should buy some damn trail running shoes already.

All excuses aside, today's run was probably my worst ever. But shit happens. Bad runs happen. I'm sure even elite athletes have bad days. What matters is that I did what I could and I'll try again another day.

Running, Camping and Hiking

Some highlights from the last few weeks:

1. I ran my 2nd 5K and finished one minute and 40 seconds faster (or less slow, as the case may be) than my 1st. In 850 degree heat and 1,000% humidity.

2. Celebrated Brad's 31st birthday with an ice cream cake and dinner at Lola's. <3

3. Went camping in the Canaan Valley National Wilderness Refuge in Davis WV with Brad and Ilsa. Saw no wildlife.

4. Ate at Hellbender's twice while in Davis. Drank PBR.

5. Hiked the most difficult 12 miles of my life in the Dolly Sods Wilderness Area. This included calf-deep mud, ankle-rolling rocks and multiple stream crossings.

6. We ALMOST GOT STRUCK BY LIGHTNING in a large open field on top of a mountain in Dolly Sods. Cloud-to-ground lightning struck about 100 feet away from us. It was one of the scariest things that has ever happened to me; I literally thought I might die.

7. I learned that I really am stronger than I think I am.

It Felt Like Springtime on That February Morning

What a beautiful weekend to live in West Virginia! Saturday was warm and gorgeous. Sunday was warmer and . . . gorgeous-er. Today is rainy and crappy but, you know, it's Monday so no one really cares. I hear that it's supposed to snow again later in the week but for now, it feels like spring and that is enough to pull all of us out of our winter-induced funk.

Yesterday afternoon, Brad and I walked around downtown holding hands in the sunshine. We debated hitting up Ellen's for ice cream, but since they don't accept debit cards and neither of us had cash, we drove instead to our favorite Mexican restaurant for margaritas and nachos. I love days like that. Years ago, when we lived in Milwaukee, we would occasionally take an afternoon and walk around the city, going from bar to bar to restaurant, just the two of us, and it was always so much fun.

Five of Brad's friends are coming down from Pittsburgh this weekend for an epic, 2-day Kanawha State Forest ride. This means that we'll have a house full of bikes and skinny dudes in spandex. I'm planning to bake a few kinds of cookies and stuff for them this week. I love to bake but I refuse to have a surplus of cookies in the house; I would end up eating them for breakfast (or lunch, or dinner).

*****

Oh, and I ran two miles yesterday, without stopping to walk. To most people this is not that big of an accomplishment, but for me it is! I'm 2/3 of the way to a 5K, which was my goal for the year, and it's only February! If I can run 2 miles, why not 3? And if I can run 3, soon it will be 5. And if I can run 5, I can certainly run 6! I might end up running a 10K this year in addition to the 5K.

In the interest of full disclosure, I have to admit that I ran the 2 miles on the treadmill at the gym. I know, I know, it's harder outside. But I played around with the treadmill's incline and speed to make it more closely resemble outdoor running. Right now, I'm still working on building up my lungs. I'll worry about my legs later.

At Least Five Hours

Brad is a cyclist, and he's probably the fittest person I know. But when we met, over 11 years ago, he wasn't. I mean, he was always in reasonable shape, but he was not the muscley-legged, cardiovascular anomaly that he is now. In the past 6 years or so, his body has completely changed shape.

I want that.

I have recently discovered that I have a rather high body fat percentage, even though I'm technically only about 1-2 pounds overweight. In discussing this last night (my desire to change my body shape dramatically), Brad suggested I up my time spent working out to at least five hours a week for now. And that, as I get fitter, I should increase that time. Since I have begun to work out in the mornings during the workweek, I have a limited amount of time that I can spend at the gym and still make it to work on time. So my plan is to get three hours of cardio in on the weekends; at least an hour and a half both Saturday and Sunday.

This Saturday, I hiked at our beloved KSF for an hour and a half, and yesterday I spent the same amount of time on various cardio machines at the gym -- treadmill, elliptical, stairmaster. I nearly fell asleep during the Vikings game last night and, walking up stairs is a bit of a struggle. But Monday is my rest day, so hopefully I'll bounce back by 545 tomorrow morning. I have a date with my favorite treadmill.

Well I'm Glad That is Over

Sigh.

So far, in the 12 days since I wrote my last, optimistic, new year-fresh post, I have drunk a ton of diet soda and not worked out one single time. However, after all is said and done, I've lost 5 actual pounds.

On January 2, I was stricken with the worst case of food poisoning I have ever seen, save for that one time that Brad knowingly ate rotten trout. I couldn't keep down even water, I got severely dehydrated, and I was unable to eat real food for 5 days. If I had health insurance, you can bet I would have gone to the emergency room on Sunday morning, after I awoke, presumably from fainting, on the bathroom floor. Unfortunately, I am not eligible for my company's plan yet, so I toughed it out.

During this time, I dropped about 7-8 pounds, which is partially awesome but mostly scary (as I mentioned, 3 of those came back once I was able to eat and drink normally). I finally feel 100% normal, thank goodness. The culprit? I'm sorry to say I believe it was a bottle of kombucha. I understand that a small percentage of people have a severe "allergic" reaction to this fermented tea, that manifests as gastrointestinal toxicity. I guess I will never know for sure, but you can bet that I will never again drink that shit.

Today, I had a long, long day that began at 530 am. As I drove to a jobsite in Morgantown, I contemplated: if I can wake up at 530 to drive for 2.5 hours for work, why can't I awake at 530 to hit the gym for 1 hour before work? I'm going to try to put that into action this week. I am starting with a small goal, of working out before work ONCE this week. Perhaps tomorrow; since I'm already super tired, I don't think I could stay up late if I tried.

Bonus: An Actual Conversation

I'm lying on the couch, in the throes of food poisoning, watching a Jersey Shore marathon and eating crackers. Brad walks in, all handsome and fresh-faced from a 4-hour mountain bike ride. I probably glare at him, I can't help it!

Brad: I think you've invented a celebrity diet.
K: Yeah, saltines and ginger ale?
Brad: Saltines and diet ginger ale.

Small Comforts

Our trip to Davis was wonderful! Brad and I both left with the opinion that Charleston was going to seem very dull in comparison. Oh, Blackwater Falls. Oh, the Purple Fiddle. Oh, the pumpkin pancakes at the Bright Morning Inn.

Unfortunately, we both came down with bad colds immediately upon arriving back at home. So bad, in fact, that I stayed home from work today and yesterday. I always feel guilty for missing work; I think about the work I have to do and I don't want to let anyone down. So happily, I will be back in the office tomorrow. But on days like this, I look for small everyday comforts to make me feel better. Nothing beats a day of cuddling on the couch with my dog, Boy Scout caramel corn, and a Project Runway marathon.

Davis

We're taking a romantic mini vaca this weekend and heading to Davis WV. We'll be staying at a Bed and Breakfast, hiking in Blackwater Falls State Park, eating at Hellbender's Burritos, and shopping at Mountain Made.

The weather forecast looks awesome. I'm really hoping for clear nights so that we can see the stars (I've heard that the views there are spectacular).

I can't wait!

Firsts

Brad and I have been together for 11 years. We were engaged for three years, and as of today, we've been married for 13 wonderful days.

In all of this time together, we've had a lot of firsts. First date, first kiss, first time we said "I love you." First night spent in our first apartment. The first time we moved out of our home state; the first time we realized we wanted to spend the rest of our lives with each other.

Now that we're married, we get to celebrate a bunch of new firsts. Some of them feel like milestones, like the first time I referred to Brad as "my husband," and some of them are seemingly mundane, like the first time we went hiking as a married couple. For the first time in my life, I probably won't be spending Christmas in Wisconsin. So it will be our first Christmas spent without our families. But I'm OK with this, since we are our own family now.

We have so many firsts in our future: first wedding anniversary, the first time we buy a house, our first baby? I can't wait to celebrate them all!

Married

Little Updates

Our wedding is in 15 days! Next Thursday, I'll be traveling to Wisconsin to do last-minute wedding things and staying there until mid-week after the wedding. I will be there for about two weeks; it will be the longest I have spent in my hometown since I first left, when I was 20 years old.

*****

I've been sick for the last four days with a horrific sore throat and an overall feeling like I was recently hit by a truck. Bad timing. We are due to have a house full of cyclists this weekend, as the infamous WVMBA Black Bear Race in Kanawha State Forest is on Sunday. Brad and several of his Pittsburgh friends are racing, so our house will be full of skinny guys with shaved legs, bike parts, lycra clothing, and chamois cream. I was planning on hiking to the top of the trail to watch people crash on the moss-covered cliffs, but if I don't start to feel better, I might have to sit this one out.

*****

Finally, I leave you with a photo of my dog on a mossy log.

Little Updates, Lawyer Edition

Brad finished the bar exam yesterday at 4.00 pm. His results won't come back until sometime in October, so I won't have to start referring to him as "Counselor" for a couple of months. He and I are both relieved that it's over. We celebrated with a bottle of cheap champagne at home, a drink with his future colleagues at a Charleston-swanky bar, and Mexican food at Los Agaves. All in all, it was a good night.

*****

Tomorrow we are heading up to PA where Brad will be racing in the Wilderness 101. It should be a good time -- a lot of Brad's friends are doing this race as well and I think I am going to volunteer at one of the aid stations. Nothing beats watching people stumble around incoherently after they've been riding for 8 hours!

I am a bit concerned, as I tend to be, about our dog. She doesn't always get along with other dogs, and sometimes people let their dogs run around, unleashed, at these events. Hopefully it won't be a problem this weekend! I have a 15' leash with which I will tether her to a tree and hope for the best. I'm sure she'll just lie there, peering at me, like she does at home. She's becoming incredibly lazy now that she's almost 4 years old.

*****

Brad and I are suit shopping this afternoon. I have high hopes for the Jos A Bank clearance sale!